When I think about how I lost love, I think about Alfred Lord Tennyson’s quote, “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” When I lost love, I felt the whole world had collapsed around me.   In case you’re at the same place as I am, staring into the abyss, my story should help you.

I think it is essential to remember that every relationship has a natural lifespan.   If you’re really young, then chances are that relationship will not last more than a few days but as you become older, the lifespan of the relationship will increase with age.  Some relationships go wrong after a certain period, there’s not much you can do about it. Most of us are bound to have that one great love during the course of our lives. At this point, don’t be surprised if the other relationships start to terminate. I understand lost love and the natural process that makes it all happen.

In my case, my girlfriend and I were thinking about ratcheting up our relationship.  Her lease was about to end, and she wanted to move into my studio apartment.   Since we were already spending a lot of time at my place, it all made sense from a financial point of view.

But there is something important about having separate places.  I know I lost love because I couldn’t handle her taking our relationship to this level.   I figure that our relationship had run its course especially since I was not that eager to become more committed.

Now, I know I handled the situation badly.  I went to a friend’s bachelor party and let’s just say things got out of hand. I was really hammered at the party, and news of my so-called antics made its way back to my girlfriend and as a result, got dumped. I guess that one night was the last straw as far as she was concerned.

I guess the  breakup was going to happen at some time, especially since I was not that eager to have her move in, this party just pushed things over the edge. I think that my eagerness to avoid commitments and the direction that the relationship was heading into made me behave the way I did.

If you asked me, I’ll have to say that I was glad to have been in a relationship with my ex, even though it is apparent that she was not my true love or my soul mate. But she was someone with whom I enjoyed spending time with. Bottom line, I love her and still do but she is not my true love, the one person I hope to spend the rest of my life with.

Once she decided to break things up with me, I knew that it was the end. After everything has been said and done, I went through the process of mourning and trying to figure out what went wrong and where. I knew that I had wounded her deeply but did not want to lose touch with her totally.

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I can never get used to change and would have preferred for things to continue. But that’s a bit unrealistic, given that all relationships grow or just die out. I was not willing to take the extra step and given the circumstances, the relationship had to die out. In a manner of speaking, we had reached the end of the road as a couple and I ended up losing my love, that was it.