Is it okay to spy on your spouse?  You think you see signs of an unfaithful spouse. It is often a very strong need to know whether or not your spouse is unfaithful and exactly what kind of cheating is taking place. There are multiple reasons why the drive to spy on your spouse is so powerful. These are four reasons:

1. Being able to trust is a big reason, not the ability to trust your partner, but trusting yourself. Most likely you have sensed something is not quite right or noticed the change in your partners behavior for some time. You may have even confronted your cheating husband or wife and you were met with denial. It is impossible to start dealing with infidelity in your marriage when your still in the denial phase.

This is very hard on you because deep down inside your instinct is screaming, This is wrong! The pieces don’t fit!  To deny your gut instinct, which knows the truth, is going to create serious inner turmoil. If what your gut instinct is telling you is confirmed, you can at least know that you can trust your gut feelings. You are not off your rocker!  Spying is a way to confirm what you suspect and be able to fully trust you own feelings.

2. When you spy on your spouse it can help you feel more connected to them when they seem to be moving away. It is a way of still having contact and a connection to your spouse who was once well known. Isn’t it like the game of hide-and-seek we used to play as children? Sometimes there, sometimes gone. At least this game offers some form of contact, some involvement. You want to still be connected and are looking for some way to maintain contact.

3. Spying on an unfaithful spouse may be an honest attempt to rectify the relationship. You need to know what is really going on. Your gut instinct is telling you something is just not right. You feel there is a breach in your relationship. You need to know what it is you are up against. You are not willing to stand by and wait. You need to take action. You feel the need to make some form of movement. You want to get on with your relationship. You have to continue with your life. It is very hard to maintain any level of sanity when there is a gigantic elephant in the room that no one is willing to talk about. You have to find out the truth, confront it head on, deal with the truth, and then be free from it. If necessary, you will have to be able to move on and consider life after divorce.

4. Signs of an unfaithful spouse often means secrets. Secrets take a ton of work to keep!  Keeping one day in and day out has a very powerful impact. It is the proverbial elephant that takes up the whole room that no one wants to talk about. People will do whatever it take to avoid it, but that won’t make it go away. Emotionally speaking, you can not miss it. Secrets are a drain.

If the secret continues to exist, the impact will be felt in very subtle ways. It can make people physically sick, sometimes seriously. Depression might set in. People will begin doing crazy things. Children will begin to act out, quit achieving, and show  a bunch of other symptoms. Your children or the next generation will often times carry the emotional load. You feel the need to spy because you can’t live with a secret. You must found out the truth about your significant other. You want to feel the freeing power of the exposed secret and the opportunity it offers for healing, resolution, a rich relationship and a productive life.

If you suspect your spouse is cheating on you I would strongly recommend you read my How To Catch A Cheating Spouse Review.